It's easy to get caught up in the feelings, opinions and experiences of others when stepping into something new. This has been very true for me as I plan my trip to Spain.
When I first decided to go to Spain to walk the Camino de Santiago, I had every intention of walking as much of the 800km as I could. As I did more research, chatted with other pilgrims online and searched my own soul, I realized it was not a realistic goal for me.
But, realizing it and changing my plans were two different things altogether.
Why?
Because of postings that I read on Camino forums where 'tourist pilgrims' are bashed and ridiculed.
There are some who have walked the entire Camino Frances, and to them, anyone doing anything else is a sham. They are vocal in expressing their disdain for tourist pilgrims.
For a non-athlete like me, someone who just wants time alone to walk, to think and to be one with God, this kind of unnecessary judgmentalism was disconcerting. It took months for me to realize that I answer to no one. If my Camino experience doesn't mirror that of the best of them, so what?
My plan now is to have no plans. I'm going to Spain on October 17th and returning home on November 7th. What happens between those two dates is up in the air. I will walk, I will reflect, I will enjoy life but most of all, I will spend time writing.
You see, the walking is secondary. What happens when I walk is that my soul is open to Spirit.
My goal is to be whole, to seek truth and to put words on paper. And, to do that, I need to be unburdened from society, from demands and from routine. Finding myself while losing myself.
How that will unfold is still unknown. As a tourist pilgrim, I will find my own way.
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